I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
