We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
