Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
This is the high leading the old right now
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
