Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
