Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
