fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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