just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
