I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
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