did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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