ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
