rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
