apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
