The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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