But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
