At least make sure they are 18
Why
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
