He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
