well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
