im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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