I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize