I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I'm having to shit out rocks
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
