When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize