She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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