Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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