He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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