They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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