i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize
