I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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