Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
