her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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