my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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