She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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