I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
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