omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
