suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Randomize
