So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
