I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
