he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
