I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
