Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
