I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize