I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
