I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
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