Christians are straight up FREAKS
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Randomize
