no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
