that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
