woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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