Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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