They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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