So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
