Sry I called you an 8
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
