I'm going to rape someone's good day.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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